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Adultery Blog - How to Catch A Cheater > Cheating Adultery > Healing Tips - Healing Process Tips
The first thing you have to do is try to understand why the affair happened. Until you do, you won't be able to put the past behind you and move on.
It's common at this early stage to see your relationship as an emotional death camp, with no chance of pardon or escape.
People who have affairs lie about them, but the majority of these people don't lie about other things.
But once a confession is made, absolute full disclosure is essential and the cheater should own up to all affairs that have occurred during the relationship.
The healing process begins when you bear witness to your feelings and make sense of your pain. The greatest threat to recovery is the loss of hope itself.
To really build trust, the betrayed needs to know that the partner definitely won't cheat again.
The cheater needs to do everything possible to make the other person feel safe -- whether that means handing over all credit card statements, providing cell phone and beeper numbers, or making frequent check-in phone calls.
Sever all contact with the third party immediately. Clear boundaries need to be established if you want to rebuild the trust you have broken with your partner.
The best thing that a cheating spouse can do is give his partner as much access as needed.
The cheater must also be willing to discuss the situation as much as the betrayed spouse needs. So it's important for the unfaithful not to be impatient or think they are doing it to punish them.
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